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February 13, 1975 Dear Friends: I have had a number of
phone calls and conversations with people in the last two days in which I
have been asked what I was going to do or say. My first reaction was simply that
I did not have to do anything. Then I asked myself if this answer was a
cop-out. Because, after reviewing the possibilities, I did not find anything
I could say which would truly help Richard, you, or me, I decided that
“Nothing” was the appropriate response to the question. So why am I writing this
letter? Well, there are several things which I feel I should say at this
time. First of all, if any one of you has a question which you want me to
answer, I am available by phone or in person anytime. Many of you know this,
but there are others of you who may need to have me open the door to your
questions. I will answer your questions to the best of my ability,
differentiating my opinions from what I have been told or studied, but I will
answer no question you do not ask, for to do this would be an interference in
your environment as well as Richard’s and probably constitute gossip. Second, I do not share
Richard’s reality that we are not now married, nor his reality that we have
not been married for some time. I will acknowledge that Richard apparently
does not feel married at this time, but for myself I must say I do. I chose
to love Richard sixteen years ago, and I still choose to love him. I cannot
control Richard or his decisions, but I am responsible for my own. At this
time, I will not seek a divorce, consent to a divorce, nor desire a divorce. Third, I have heard from
several people that the Trustees have been holding back information because
they felt you could not handle it. Where on earth that idea comes from is
beyond me. Personally, I expect you to handle all information that comes your
way, and deep down in me I know you can. But that does not give me the right
to ask you to carry my problems or any other problems that you cannot solve
because they are not yours. I believe that it is karmically dangerous for me
to do or say anything which could cause you to doubt Richard, THE ULTIMATE
FRONTIER, the Brotherhoods, or yourself. Please remember it is not my job to
provide your tests. Lastly, I would like to
deal with a comment made to me the other day which troubled me more than
anything else has up to this point. A member said to me that she had decided
that the only person she could trust was Christ. My reply to her and to the
rest of you is: for me that is not true. I trust each and every Stelle Group
participant, and I will continue to do that until you as an individual prove
me wrong. I have dreamed of a place for a long time where I could trust all
other citizens. For me that dream became Stelle. And I will not give up that
dream. Sure, you will stumble, and I will stumble. But I believe we will get
up and go on. As we make mistakes, we will fix them. And isn’t that what
Egoic growth is all about? I trust that each of you desires your dream enough
to hang on to it and bring it into reality through daily practice of the
Virtues and the Philosophy. Sincerely, Gail Kieninger |
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